Do you ever have a moment where you are listening to a song that you've heard a million times before, but never were truly listening, and suddenly you realize how much the lyrics mirror your life? I was cleaning out my closet (a favorite pastime of a Type A organized control freak) and was floored by a Dan Fogelberg song that I've grown up with. Maybe my brain made the connection between the lyrics and my life because time is closing in on two years without Jackson. Whatever the reason, I think Mr. Fogelberg (who also lost his battle with prostate cancer too young) gave a melody and words to the unique connection I had with my Dad. While we were/are such a close knit family, I was the only one who elected to follow a similar path to the one he chose thirty years before.
An excerpt from Leader of the Band by Dan Fogelberg:
The leader of the band is tired
And his eyes are growing old
But his blood runs through my instrument
And his song is in my soul
But his blood runs through my instrument
And his song is in my soul
My life has been a poor attempt
To imitate the man
I'm just a living legacy
To the leader of the band
My brothers' lives were different
For they heard another call
One went to Chicago
And the other to St. Paul
And I'm in Colorado
When I'm not in some hotel
Living out this life I've chose
And come to know so well
I thank you for the music
And your stories of the road
I thank you for the freedom
When it came my time to go
I thank you for the kindness
And the times when you got tough
And, papa, I don't think I
Said 'I love you' near enough
I am a living legacy to the leader of the band
I am almost certain that Mr. Fogelberg did not intend for me to equate "my instrument" to my brain, "his song" to finance and accounting, and "to imitate the man" to... well... living, laughing and loving just like him to the best of my abilities. While Scott did move to Chicago, BJ is definitely not in St. Paul. And I was in a hotel room in Wooster, Ohio this past week, not Colorado. I am sure Dan Fogelberg would appreciate; however, how much this song speaks to me now. Thank you, Dan Fogelberg, for singing a song that makes becoming a CPA just like her Daddy sound WAY COOLER than it actually is. Could you find Jack and sing Part of the Plan together on September 22nd? I would greatly appreciate it.
